Breathe Easy: Misfortunes of MacKenzie- Take 2.

I am sitting down at my usual spot in the Starbucks on cambridge street in Boston. I have free time before my next class, and between seeing my surgeons who saw me butt naked when they removed my kidney, walk in and out to grab coffees, and the screaming children throwing tantrums on the ground… I had to tune it all out…so I put on my head phones, and got to writing. Here is another episode of, ' The Misfortunes of MacKenzie.'

I woke up late today, ok-ok… everyone does that some times- so no big deal. When I saw the time on my phone as I rubbed my groggy eyes, I immediately hopped out of bed in attempts to get ready as quickly as possible- which really means pick up the outfit on the floor… yeah... the one I wore yesterday (hey,drastic times call for drastic measures) and then I ran a brush through my hair…wait no, I quickly decided to skip that part since I now have shorter hair! So, instead, I just threw it up into a ponytail and was out the door.

When I reached my car, I was relieved that I had five minutes to spare! You would think, after all the misfortunes I have encountered, I would know to never get ahead of my self…but clearly not. I reached towards the handle of my car, a smirk on my face that was screaming with pride for beating the odds and getting ready in time, when I realized my doors wouldn't open. They were completely frozen shut. I was pulling them as hard as I possibly could...and BEFORE you start laughing at the thought of little, weak me pulling on the doors like a ten year old, I do actually have some upper body strength- but those doors wouldn't budge. So I got all dramatic/temper tantrum like, as I slipped and fell into the snow the was up to my shins- I am sure this was an attractive site to see. Finally, the passenger side door flew open as icicles flew along with it. I climbed through the passenger side to get over to the driver seat. As soon as my butt hit the seat, I hit the gas, and raced to the train.. I couldn't miss it! (Mom I am just saying this to emphasize the story, I was driving calmly and within the speed limit- you know me, I never lose my calm...right) Anyway, I made it in time to catch the train! Great! Except, here is where the misfortune really begins.

As I boarded, I was greeted with glaring eyes, eyes that were pretty much screaming "DON'T SIT NEXT TO ME." Unfortunately, the train was jam packed and I had no other choice then to sit next to someone. I took the first seat I saw available, which was next to an older gentleman. I quickly realized that I had made a terrible decision. I was sitting right in front of a seat that consisted of three toddlers and a mother that looked desperate for a glass of wine. Each one of the toddlers was screaming. One child was even banging his head on the back of my seat… and I know I am not a mother, but I don't believe that is all that great for his head. Obviously, no matter how annoying it was, I understood that these children were young, and screaming is what they do... but gosh, at 7AM… I wanted to join the kid and start banging my head against the seat to.

The screaming went on for another five or so minutes, and then came the silence! Right as I let out a sigh, again- I getting ahead of myself, I heard an "oh no.." come out of the mother's mouth. Then came an immediate light tap on my shoulder. I turned around to face this distraught woman, "I am so sorry, my son just threw up... and it went under the seat." MAYBE YOU SHOULD HAVE STOPPED HIM FROM BANGING HIS HEAD ON THE SEAT… of course I didn't say this to her, she was obviously sorry… so I looked down to see throw up below me, I told her it was okay…. I am thinking my facial expression may have been saying something else, but there was nothing I could do. I just stood up to change seats, dragging my feet along the way to get what was on it, off. Luckily my bags and such were on the seat with me, so only the soles of my shoes had the bad luck this time. Of course I walked around the rest of the day thinking I smelt like child vom, so that was wonderful.

But how this story really becomes humorous, for you guys, not me, is that this is the second time this has happened to me. Yes, the second time that child vomit has landed on me at the most absurd time. The first time was when I was on my way back from Alabama, I was with Soraya… you can ask her about this story for a more laughable version- she loves it. I had made the flight reservations (so it's really her fault for leaving me with that job) I picked the cheapest flight I could find- which ended up being the worst possible flight's, yes flight with an s, you could imagine. We left Birmingham, landed in Atlanta… had to stay on the plane for thirty minutes to let some people off, and allow more people to board. We then took off again, this time landing in Orlando Florida… and again, had to stay on the plane… some people got off if it was their destination, and some people got on. Most of the people who got on in Orlando were families with young kids- as they all wore some type of disney memorabilia. After the stop in Orlando, we then made one more stop before Boston, in Newark. And again, we had to stay on the plane while others got off and on. Right as those wheels touched the ground in Newark… the little boy behind me threw up everywhere. This time however, it got all over my things. My backpack was covered in "Disney fun." That family was getting off in Newark… so they escaped with a quick, and embarrassed "sorry" as the exited the plane. I sat there in awe… not sure what to do about the mess. Remember how I said I picked the cheapest flight, it was on the cheapest airline- Spirit. Never heard of them? Yeah, I am not surprised. So I brought my back pack into the bathroom to wipe it off, and then just waited until we reached boston- where I practically ran to the closest shower. Soraya couldn't contain her laughter.